To all of you ladies out there who dream of being in your gal pal's wedding...think about it! When my darling friend Candace asked me to be in her wedding, I didn't really think about what went along with that, I just joyfully accepted. Now, don't get me wrong, I love Candace, and I loved being a part of her special day, but let's face it...i'm broke. I have zero dollars, all the time.
We went dress shopping first, and Candi was gracious enough to let us each pick out our own gown as long as it was baby blue. I fell in love with my gown, i'm the fat one on the left by the way, and almost had a heart attack when I saw the price tag. Everyone decided to buy their dresses right then, on the spot, even though we were supposed to just be shopping around and getting ideas. I had absolutely no money and everyone was talking about what would happen if the color got discontinued. I started to panic. I actually had to borrow the money to pay for it, which made me feel like shit quite honestly. I paid it back as promptly as possible, but I don't like to borrow money. Ever. Under any circumstance.
After I had the dress, there were bridal expos to go to. There were several advantages and disadvantages of going to these. The advantages were hanging out with Candace and eating free cupcakes. The disadvantages were that there were a lot of people there, and I get nervous around large crowds. Also, there was a lot of walking around, and it is kind of boring.
Next came the planning of the bachelorette party. The maid of honor wanted to stay in a hotel and rent a car and do all of these things that cost a lot of money. I don't have any money, so I had to party poop a little. I told her that if we were going to do all of the things that she wanted to do, I wouldn't be able to afford my share, and therefore, would be unable to attend. I really hated being "that girl" but when you can't afford something, you just can't! THEN, when plans were actually set, they made the bachelor party and the bachelorette party on the exact same day at the exact same time. Now, this would normally be fine, but my daughter's father was also in the wedding, and so it came down to, only one of us could go to the party. He ended up staying home to watch our daughter, in the end, and I went to the party. It was okay, except that I had to spend the night with a bunch of girls that I don't know very well, so I felt kind of awkward.
Next came the rehearsal dinner which would have been okay, except that my daughter's father and I kept fighting. I don't think he realized that he actually had to do stuff besides stand there on the wedding day, and so he was an ass through the entire process really.
The next day was the wedding. It was beautiful! I almost cried. Twice actually. The first time, when the photographer had me standing and posing for what seemed like an eternity, and the second, when I saw my friend walk down the aisle and marry the man that she loves. It made all the other shit worth it, just to see her so happy.
you are not fat!
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